by picklesandchampagne » Wed May 20, 2009 02:06 am
I have been amicably separated from my husband of 18 years for 4.5 years. I took out a 100k life insurance policy on myself which I pay for.
I have two children...13 and 17 that I have as the beneficiaries. Is he entitled to the management of those benefits if I die and the children are still minors?
Is he entitled to the Florida spousal 30% of the benefits since we are still legally married?
He cannot manage money at all. My fear is that he can take those benefits and spend them improperly just by virtue of the fact that he would be the remaining parent.
I have two children...13 and 17 that I have as the beneficiaries. Is he entitled to the management of those benefits if I die and the children are still minors?
Is he entitled to the Florida spousal 30% of the benefits since we are still legally married?
He cannot manage money at all. My fear is that he can take those benefits and spend them improperly just by virtue of the fact that he would be the remaining parent.
Posted: Tue May 26, 2009 03:56 am Post Subject:
I know what a the SGLI says. I think I'm done dealing with ignorant people.
Unfortunately, it is not the people that are trying to help you that are being ignorant. You have received some great advice from insurance experts with 20+ years of experience...even experience specifically regarding your circumstances. It is your choice whether or not to take heed and make sure that your son and his best interests are taken care of.
Will it be very uncomfortable to explain to your friend? NO...at least it shouldn't be. It is not that you do not trust her...in fact you would still be putting your faith in her as the trustee. If she is truly the right person for the position (which only you can judge)...then she will wholeheartedly agree that you both need to ensure that everything is done properly and without room for errors or mishaps.
I am absolutely positive (although I could be pleasantly surprised) that you are not going to post on here and say that you will at least check into the matter and make sure you haven't received misinformation. However, I do hope that a little nagging thought in your mind will make you call a lawyer and talk with someone that is trained in these matters.
AFTER ALL, isn't the welfare and wellbeing of your son worth it? You don't owe anyone here an explanation nor will you ever have to apologize to anyone here for not taking their advice. This is all about your son and I know that you want to do what's best for him. Keep in mind that the clerks only deal with their personal experiences and what they have learned...They do not have any insurance training and are NOT the best people to ask (although I'm sure this is not what you are relying on knowing you!!)
I have problems with pharmacists and staff at physician's offices advising my clients against health programs, medicare supplements, etc. I had a billing clerk tell a medicare client that they did accept medicare, but that they did not accept the supplement from AARP because AARP was not an insurance company. (Side note...the AARP supplement is done through United Health Care ... which is an insurance company) As a result, the client cancelled her supplement and now can't get another one because of her poor medical history.
People mean well, and normally think that they understand things that may actually be beyond their comprehension and level of understanding. Nobody would intentionally steer you wrong, or at least I hope they wouldn't. I've read enough of your posts to know that you will do your homework, and whether you post it here or not...you'll make sure that you are doing the best thing for your son.
If you do need any help (I have forms for trusts / wills / etc. and do estate planning and trust formations)...feel free to PM me and I'll send you whatever I can to help you. It will be confidential of course.
Posted: Tue May 26, 2009 04:01 am Post Subject: insurance
Yeah,..ok.
Posted: Tue May 26, 2009 11:53 am Post Subject:
I KNOW what the SGLI says...thanks anyway ( yeah, right).
there is no need what so ever to be ugly to pickels, she came here for information, about her own ins and children...through that she has given up her time to find links etc. to assist you.....she's not an agent, she's just like you a consumer...but a consumer who took HER time to find some important links for your consideration....i can't find where she has said one cross word to you...i'm disappointed in your rudeness to 'her'..++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Leave her alone, let her do what she wants, take advise from non-licensed insurance experts hopefully she won't die anyway till her boy is over eighteen...she has the information, (as does anyone else in similar circumstances that is surfing), shamefully it's brought out ugliness directed toward innocent bystanders, that only wanted to help, and have not said a cross word (ie, pickels, me, chris etc)....there's just no need for that....
She wants everyone to forget it...'move on' I for one will do the same..but will keep an eye on the 'tone'.
Posted: Tue May 26, 2009 12:56 pm Post Subject:
thanks Lori. I will move on as well....like the old saying goes..."You can lead a horse to water...."
Now if the insurance industry could just create some "marriage" insurance I would have a whole new subject to talk about! LOLOL :)
Posted: Wed May 27, 2009 06:49 am Post Subject:
Nobody would intentionally steer you wrong, or at least I hope they wouldn't.
Chris, I think we have done what we could do. Now, it upon her to decide what she wants to do with it. We can only suggest but can't direct anyone.
However, I think we have got distracted from the original post. Hopefully Pickle has find our information/suggestions useful for her.
I'd like to thank Pickle for sticking with us and investing her time in helping others as well. She displays the true spirit of the community.
~Jeremy
Posted: Wed May 27, 2009 09:49 am Post Subject:
I couldn't agree more Jeremy...pickle,
Now if the insurance industry could just create some "marriage" insurance I would have a whole new subject to talk about! LOLOL
the way you did your rearch I'm sure you would be a great help in some other threads as well ... re: ''marriage'' ins... I think they call that a pre-nup... :wink: I got married too young though to think about marrying for money, ... :wink:Posted: Wed May 27, 2009 12:37 pm Post Subject:
Thanks to Jeremy and to Lori...LOL on the pre-nup!
I am a research fanatic. I have a personal concierge business and one of my strongest selling points is doing research for my clients. Sometimes I am good at finding the info, but don't always understand what I have found. So to answer Jeremy's question...yes, the forum was great at helping me understand what I found but didn't understand!
Lori....I will poke around and if I find anything I can be of help with I will certainly put in my two cents.
P&C
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