live in tn...had wreck 10/1 in OK...other driver at fault

live in tn...had wreck 10/1 in OK...other driver was at fault...fell asleep, crossed the median and hit us broadside. She refused medical transport. Our van was totalled, caught on fire, and my husband was trapped inside. Truck drivers were able to pull him out. He had major surgery..11 screws/2 plates in shoulder, cracked elbow with 20+ stitches, broken arm, wrist and foot. he had many cuts, bruises and small burns. He is still under the care of an orthopedic specialist and receives PT 3x/wk. He will have a permanent disability...will not regain full use of shoulder and arm. I received no major injuries...bruised from neck to toes...knees took biggest impact and i still have trouble with pain/swelling. I missed 40 days of work and my husband is still not back at work (since oct. 1). Medical bills exceed 70,000. What would be a fair settlement? We've never been in this situation. We don't expect to get rich but we do feel we deserve to be compensated from lost days at work, and pain and suffering.